She promised me she wasn’t going to leave. In her last letter, she wrote: I’ll never leave your side. I’ll love you till I die.” Today she’s someone else’s wife. She’s not loving me again and I’m here wondering why she’s still alive.
But I can’t blame her. Recently I met her. She was looking all gorgeous. Instantly I said to myself: “It looks as though she made the best decision of her life when she decided to leave me.” I asked: “What happened to the promises you made me?” And she answered: “Some promises we can’t keep. Especially the ones we make for no reasons at all.
It’s a human nature to sometimes make promises we can’t keep. When everything is going well. In the moment when our hearts are filled with joy, we turned to make a lot of promises. Most of these promises die even before they sprout.
I made a promise to myself to keep my body in shape. I will wake up in the morning and start the treadmill, and begin running till there is no breath left in me. It’s hard running from nothing. It is more difficult running and still standing at one position. There is no joy doing that, but it’s a promise I made to myself. I had to keep running. I had to run till my pores burst open to drive away the toxic out of my skin.
The difficult thing happens when I had to deal with the dumb bells. I would be yelling. It’s a lot of pain on my muscles but I would keep going. The beginners’ curse: when you haven’t exercised for a very long time, your muscle is bruised a little when you start again. Your whole body feels like you’ve been beaten in a boxing ring. It’s hard to wake up the next morning to continue.
But it’s a promise. A promise I’ve made to myself, to keep the body in shape. The only way I know how is to run, lift, and do some aerobics. I better not stop along the way. I better do my best for a friend—my body.
I’ve been a baby. I’ve been a teenager. I’m now an adult. I’ve lost many things along the way. I’ve lost friends. I’ve lost money. I’ve lost many opportunities. People who promised to die if they stopped loving me are alive, though they stopped loving me. Through all these, one thing has been faithful; My body.
Everything I love is ending. Even the chocolate I have in my hand is slowly ending. It dies a little through every little bite. But forever I’m trapped in this sack of bones and flesh. It is the only thing that will be with me till death. If there’s a relationship I ought to service each day, If there’s a love affair I ought to keep going, It’s what exist between me and my body.
Anytime I stand on treadmill and it hurts to go on for another second, I know somewhere, my health meter has gone up a notch. So I keep running. When I’m done running and sweating and takes my bath, I feel like a new born baby. I look in the mirror and the guy in there smiles back at me. It’s like my body is saying thank you to me. I step out with confidence. I smile a lot and get a lot of smiles back.
Then one morning, the alarm will ring. I have to hit the treadmill again. I would be enjoying the sleep when the alarm goes off so I will start building up excuses. “If I don’t exercise today will I die?” I will continue sleeping. That’s alright if I will exercise the next day. We are people. We can’t always do the things we promise to do. So somedays we fail. Somedays you’ll fail to exercise. And that’s all right.
The only thing is, when you fail today, tomorrow start again.
But that’s not what happens to me. Slowly I start building excuses and someday, I stop doing it all together. The treadmill will gather dust. It becomes a shoe rack or even an ironing board. It calls to me anytime I pass by but I pretend not to hear.
Weeks will pass. Some months will pass. My body will begin to cry out to me. I begin to realize a slip in my endurance. And slowly, my strength begins to slip away. I become less sharp and ladies stop smiling when they meet.
When you refuse to give to the body what it deserves, it refuses to give back to you when you needed it the most. At the critical moment when you needed your body to function, that’s when it breaks down on you. You need your body all the way to the end. When everyone left, it was the only thing that stayed. So nourish it—sleep well, eat well and exercise regularly.
Somedays you will give up along the way. It’s alright. It’s human to fail to do certain tings sometimes. And it’s humanly possible to always go back to the things that gave you joy and brought fulfillment to your life. I give up on exercise most often. I eat a lot of bad food sometimes. Worries and anxiety tends to take away my sleep some nights but I always get back.
One day, I believe. I will hit the gym and never look back again. I will keep going so the ladies won’t stop smiling when they see me. It means a lot me.