Fulfillment of life is something each of us desire. We want to be happy. We want to have something that makes us so fulfilled each days of our lives. What happens to us—what actually makes fulfillment some kind of illusion to some of us? We all deserve to be fulfilled—it’s not meant for only few of us. It’s for everyone of us. What actually happens is that, we repeatedly do the following and they in turn steal away our joy and our right to be fulfilled.
#1. You compare to compete.
There are two reasons people compare their lives with others; to measure growth, to compete with the comparable. The later is what kills us. When you compare your life with other people, even when you come on top, you still will come out not happy. You find there is something more you have to do to stay on top. That puts pressure on you to always do things that don’t necessarily give you happiness but will rather help you to stay on top.
you end up competing with people who are not even aware that such competition exists. You place somebody’s life in your mirror. Look at it everyday and see how far you’ve come in terms of the competition. No matter the situation, you will come out the loser whenever you compare.
Everyone is fighting their own battles. Everyone is running their own race and living in the web they create with their stories. Our journeys ain’t the same. The destination might seem the same but how to reach it always comes in different forms. Why compete when you can get there on your own terms? When you compete with no one else, you always come out the winner. A simple win is right—too.
#2. You see the weight of Success in only Silver or Gold.
In your mind, you are not successful until there is money to show for it. You are not successful enough if you can’t afford to own the expensive things of this world. If you can’t afford to live lavishly, then you ain’t close to being successful. The reason you don’t and won’t feel fulfilled in life is that, you place what you’ve achieved on a scale balance with gold and the gold always is the heaviest.
If success is all about money and more of it, then you won’t be fulfilled because there’s always some space to fill with money. fulfillment comes from finding something to be happy about. Something that puts pride in your heart. Something that makes you say; “wow, I don’t believe I was able to achieve this.”
Life is full of of those moment. It comes everyday in our lives to remind us that our lives have purpose. It’s a constant reminder that your life is a source of fragrance from which others revel. You recall that moment when your child did something so great that everyone was up in an endless ovation? Then you went like; That’s my boy or that’s my girl. That moment wouldn’t have happened without you.
That’s another success. That’s fulfillment. Success shouldn’t always come with huge fanfare that the world is accustomed to. Success can be subtle and the fulfillment thereof be greater. It can be most of the things we disregard because it looks so small to count. It’s like a baby saying mama for the first time.
#3. You’re not grateful for the little things
What are you grateful for? Do you have anything in your life you could count as blessing? Stop reading now. Take a minute and reflect on all of the good things that are happening to you right now.
If you did you might have found at least one particular good thing that’s happening to you right at this moment. It’s so good you wonder how you could have made it through without it. So why don’t you find times in your busy life and be grateful for such good thing? It might be small but it’s ok. Our gratefulness even in little things shows the distance we’ll travel to experience the bigger things
Show gratitude—to people who offered a hand to hold when you needed it. It shows you appreciate their effort and they’ll continue to do more when you need them. Be grateful for having what you have now. Your life doesn’t need so much of what you don’t have now to be meaningful.
#4. You don’t live for today
The most important time—moment of anybody’s life is today. If there’s something one could do, it’s only today that the person can do it. You can’t be happy yesterday. Tomorrow is a slippery ground to bank your hopes on. What you have left is only today.
Most of the times, we are very anxious of what tomorrow might bring. It’s part of human nature to worry about the unknown. Tomorrow is unknown. We waste our today worrying about what tomorrow might bring. Then we forget to live. Then we forget to make use of the opportunities we have presently because we are too anxious about tomorrow.
We need to live for today—this moment and the times right in front of us. Most of the things about tomorrow that we worry about today usually don’t happen. We are just scared because we don’t know what could be. Then our tomorrow comes to be today and we realize that all the things we were worried about were just but force alarms.
To be fulfilled—Live your present as if it’s all you got. Embrace life and kiss your worries as they come. Stop time-traveling into the future to guess what troubles may come. Worrying don’t solve impending problems. It makes them worse. Live for today and let tomorrow be what it may.
#5. You live for what others think of you
We’ve left our lives in the hands of others who control what we can say or do at any point in time. We like to be accepted by these people and don’t want to do things that will upset their liking of us. We care so much about what they think of us and as such we live our lives only to increase our approval ratings by these people.
Deep within you, there’s someone you want to be—Inside of your heart, there’s a voice that want’s to be heard. You wish to be who you truly are. But you are scared. You’re scared you wouldn’t be accepted by the people whose opinions you hold in high esteem. You die, just so others can live their own lives through you.
How can you live a fulfilling life when you are constricted, limited, constrained by the opinions of people who shouldn’t matter in your life in the first place? There is no fulfillment in living a life that’s not yours.
However small your life could be, if you live it the way you want it then you could be proud of who you are. Then you are fulfilled, because you can own your mistake and change it. You can choose the battle you want to fight and be proud of the result.
The essence of the the victories you win would mean nothing to you, because it’s not for yourself that the victory was won. It’s for the hand that controls you—the people that controlled what it is that you can and cannot do.